Take the five tunes below, which I re-encountered while reviewing all my old research. Maybe they were never good enough to make the cut, even in retrospect, but with the fetid stench of less-than-mediocre post-grunge, humorously awful nu-metal, and pimply emo sleaze completely lifted (in favor of vapid ex-crooners gone techno and new-and-improved faux-indie haircut bands - yay!), we can now assess these songs from a safe distance on their (dubious?) merits.
Song: "Sour Girl" (2000)
Artist: Stone Temple Pilots
Ranking: Somewhere around #16 to #20
Why We Liked It: Definitely an enormous improvement over the half-baked fake-Nirvana acoustic crap ("Something In The Way" isn't that good, compared to the rest of Nevermind; why every post-grunge songwhiner felt the need to rip it off is beyond me) they peddled on their first album, and the logical progression from some of the dull, yet completely overwrought, folk experiments that marred Purple, "Sour Girl" revealed a band that was confident enough to pen a subtly melodic, deceptively melancholy ballad that didn't wallow in self-pity or bludgeon you with histronics, but still lame enough to over-earnestly take a stab at the Beatles.
Why It Didn't Make The Cut: Still felt like a huge step back from the nearly-perfected soft-rock, sugar-grunge we heard on songs like "Lady Picture Show" and the bridge of "Big Bang Baby" from 1996's Tiny Music. Something about it was too calculated for crossover chart success, including the overrated, overplayed, and kind of irritating music video. Enjoy!
Song: "Movies" (2001)
Artist: Alien Ant Farm
Ranking: #11-ish
Why We Liked It: Declaring that this band sucks goes without saying - these guys were like the junior high version of Papa Roach, who were already the junior high version of Incubus, who were basically a limp hybrid of Bon Jovi and Limp Bizkit. Seriously, AAF were nu-metal but they didn't even actually rap. Why even exist?
Well, clearly, to make DOTY's blog with this song, a deliciously bad concoction of early STP, mid-period Faith No More, and late-Bad Brains melodicism that ended up sounding like nu-metal's "Photograph" - maybe not quite as hook-filled, but solid enough for what it is, with even a few surprises (but not enough to make it toointeresting or inaccessible).
Why "Movies" - with its obvious, over-emoted, yet memorable chorus and decent chord changes (they throw something slightly weird into the chorus) - wasn't a bigger hit in its day remains a mystery.
Why It Didn't Make The Cut: Basically this.
Song: "Toxicity" (2002)
Artist: System Of A Down
Ranking: #13 or so in a light year
Why We Liked It: I really don't know. It's annoying. The melodies are hummable but very simplistic. Ugh, and the vocals. The guy can clearly sing (love the verses - call me crazy, but here they somehow remind me of these guys), and it's hard to argue with his politics, but, even worse than other left-wing idealogues with microphones and something to sing about, it sounds waaaaaay too much like he's just yelling at you. I listen to and love some bands with horrid-sounding vocals but this steps over the line of unpleasant and into "Seriously, stop yelling, please".
Why It Didn't Make The Cut: See above. Also, it wouldn't have sounded good on the mix CD. Still doesn't (I checked).
Song: "Can't Stop" (2003)
Artist: Red Hot Chili Peppers
Ranking: no higher than #15
Why We Liked It: After putting out song after tired song of mid-tempo, middle-of-the-road, aging-journalist-baiting dreck for so many years, it was hugely refreshing to hear RHCP firing on all cylinders to do what they do best - rap limply over third-rate Gang of Four and Fugazi riffs!
Why It Didn't Make The Cut: The Chili Peppers have been so bad for so long (and, let's face it, were never really any good to begin with outside of their very first single, record nearly 30 years (!) ago, by Andy Gill no less) that it was easy to overlook this return to "form", whatever that means. Also, Anthony Kiedis sings on it.
Song: "Check My Brain" (2009)
Artist: Alice In Chains
Ranking: #20
Why We Liked It: In what seemed to be the final nail in the coffin of their limited relevance, Alice In Chains announced in 2009 that it was putting out a new album with a replacement singer for long gone original howler Layne Staley. Hadn't the world endured enough warmed-over fourth generation grunge with the first encarnation of Alice In Chains, not to mention their legions of even worse still imitators?
And without Staley's improbably depressing and awkwardly honest lyrics about slowly dying from heroine addiction, drawn uncomfortably from real life experiences, how could the band be fun anymore?
Basically, it's all about that low bendy thing in the uglier than ugly verses, and then how they seamlessly go from that mess into the super generic pop-grunge chorus that would make Nickelack blush. Anyway, it's a good song, for what it is, and relative to whatever else was coming out in 2009, it's fucking "Sweet Leaf" or something. Jerry Cantrell doesn't even play any hilariously out of place Hendrix-via-hairband solos!
Why It Didn't Make The Cut: It actually shouldn't exist at all. I think it's only decent because Alice In Chains' followers were so damn bad. Also, for a song that's presumably about the dumbing down of American culture it's really un-smart. Maybe that was the point, but look at these lyrics! The chords (in the chorus) are even dumber! They make a Creed song look intelligent and well-crafted.
